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For all of us who feel only the
deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read
on:
At a recent computer expo
(COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the
auto industry and stated, "If Ford had kept up with technology like
the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got
1,000 miles to the gallon."
In response to Bill's comments,
Ford issued a press release stating :
If Ford had developed technology
like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following
characteristics
1.
For no reason whatsoever,
your car would crash...twice a day.
2.
Every time they repainted the
lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3.
Occasionally your car would
die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the
road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen
the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept
this.
4.
Occasionally, executing a
maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse
to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5.
Macintosh would make a car
that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy
to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6.
The oil, water temperature, and
alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This
Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.
7.
The airbag system would ask,
"Are you sure?" before deploying.
8.
Occasionally, for no reason
whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until
you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold
of the radio antenna.
9.
Every time a new car was
introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again
because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old
car.
10.You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the
engine off.
PS - I'd like
to add that when all else fails, you could call "customer
service" in some foreign country and be instructed in some foreign
language how to fix your car yourself!
Please share
this with your friends who have a love-hate relationship with their computer!
~unknown